Meeting halfway between sunset and sunrise

And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.” — Kahlil Gibran

Yesterday while I was in a Wi Fi Hotspot area in Milan browsing my emails, I overheard another girl sniffling quietly at her computer. A glance in her direction revealed a live Web-cam feed of a young man alongside an instant-messaging chat box. She typed her goodbye, closed the window containing his image, and wiped her eyes before walking away.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eVKTB_4kwOw[/youtube]

I felt a powerful emotional punch inside me. I saw myself in her, we are both living a long distance relationship or LDR in short. I remember my “significant other” I left in Manila. A fresh memory of a warm body and a smiling face next to me is what I have now. My laptop and my mobile phone substituted that loving figure. Every waking hour, my hand would search out for my cp under my pillow to check if there’s any message from my “special one”.  As I stand up, still half awake, I would turn on my pc wanting to know if an email from my “partner” has reached my inbox and as I walk slowly inside the bathroom, my heart wishes for a short call, where my ears could hear a voice whispering ” I love You”, ” I miss you”, ” Take care”, or whatever.

These “technological intimacies” are all I need to perk up my day.

Being into a long distance relationship means we have to meet halfway. My sunrise would mean my partner’s sunset. It means passing our day without synchronization of our feelings, needs, desires or brain waves. Sometimes, anger or discouragement creeps in, particularly, when one is having a rotten day and a loving presence is necessary at that given moment but ends up frustrated because the “other half” is still sleeping!

Every sunset I feel a struggle between  what I’ll call my “Euro-Self” and my “Fil-Self”. My euro-self is experiencing positive cash flows, is marveling at europe’s historical, art and cultural heritage and is talking in different language. While my Fil-self, the loving partner and soon to be entrepreneur has been temporarily left behind!

Should I give up? I don’t think so. Long distance relationship is challenging and difficult but is NOT impossible! I believe it has the same chance of succeeding as any other relationship. Trust, honesty and communication are important ingredients plus adding creativity will make the waiting less painful.

With the right amount of effort and interest on both parts, a long distance relationship can survive the obstacles it will frequently be challenged with. As long as we both refresh our memories of why we chose to do this in the first place, trust each other, inform one another of our personal lives, keep in touch, avoid guilt-tripping, and visit, our relationship can turn out to be one of the most successful and happy relationships that ever existed.  Achieving these, both of us will be secure, happy and satisfied until the day comes when we will re-unite for good and build our wonderful future together

Meeting halfway  while waiting is our commitment because we believe in love …and perhaps we’ll be following our “destiny” (?) who knows!

They say: “Love which has been tested by distance, time and obstacles, and has passed, is true love“.
Therefore, I say to myself and to you: Don’t let discouragement gets in your way!

One last thing, experiencing a long distance relationship with my “significant other” is like living my faith in God. It’s like a long distance relationship  too. I don’t see Him physically BUT I can feel His love for me. He doesn’t send sms, emails or fax but His gestures of assurances of His presence through the people I meet or interact everyday; His language through the beauty of nature and my daily experiences in life suffice to tell me: He is with me!

It’s cool to be loved even if I don’t see the person…just like my online friends here! 🙂

Long distance relationship is possible.

What do you think?

LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP

QUOTES

There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” – Mahatma Gandhi

What greater thing is there for two human souls that to feel that they are joined… to strengthen each other… to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories.” – George Eliot

Loving you from a distance has taught me that even though it hurts, it’s all worth it when I get to see you smile and hold you in my arms for the first time in months … it has taught me that true love doesn’t care about the distance, nor does it care about the age difference. It has taught me that even though it’s hard to miss you, you’re always in my dreams. It has taught me the true meaning of lonliness, and of the true beauty of the stars. I think that us being apart has only strengthened our friendship, and I know that next time you come home … we’ll be just like we were before.” – Anonymous

Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.” – Thomas Fuller

Absence diminishes small loves and increases great ones, as the wind blows out the candle and blows up the bonfire.” – Francois de la Rouchefoucauld

Can miles truly separate you from friends? If you want to be with someone you love, aren’t you already there?” – Richard Bach

I looked in all the places you aren’t. I just can’t find the places you are. I only know that you are where I am not.” – Winnie the Pooh

“And I will love him no matter what you say. You are simply too immature to understand that love does stretch for miles and miles. So you just be an immature little kid looking for love in all the wrong places, and I will be content with mine right where it is, not all those miles away, but in my heart, and in his heart, where distance does not matter.” – Anonymous

If I go away
What would still remain of me?
The ghost within your eyes?
The whisper in your sighs?
You see…
Believe
And I’m always there.” – Jon Oliva

Love is missing someone whenever you’re apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you’re close in heart.” – Kay Nudsen

In true love the smallest distance is too great, and the greatest distance can be bridged.” – Hans Nouwens

That farewell kiss which resembles greeting, that last glance of love which becomes the sharpest pang of sorrow.” – George Eliot

Man is a knot into which relationships are tied.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Oh, the comfort – the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person – having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together; certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then with the breath of kindness blow the rest away.” – Dinah Craik, A Life for a Life, 1859

If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting? – Stephen Levine

Think of me fondly when we’ve said good bye. Remember me, once in a while. Please promise me you’ll try. When you find that once again you long to take your heart back and be free, if you ever find a moment spare a thought for me.” – Andrew Webber, “Phantom of the Opera”

And what we got is something special, and what we are is a perfect match, and three-thousand miles can never come between us. No matter what we do it’s always you and me.” – Juliana theory, “Goodnight Starlight”

Saying good-bye to you today is the hardest thing i’ll ever have to do, and when i get back, i can honestly swear that i’ll never do it again. I love you now for what we’ve already shared, and I love you now in anticipation for all that’s to come. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. I miss you already, but i’m sure in my heart that you’ll be with me always. In the few days i spent with you, you became my dream.'” – Nights in Rodanthe by Nicholas Sparks

More Long Distance Quotes to follow…

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Do You, Love YOU?

Had we not loved ourselves at all, we could never have been obliged to love anything. So that self-love is the basis of all love. – Thomas Traherne (1636-1674), British clergyman, poet, mystic. Fourth Century, no. 55, Centuries (written c. 1672, publ. 1908)

“I wasn’t loved as a child and my family doesn’t understand me” exclaims Teresa, the passenger sitting next to me on my flight to Italy last Saturday. I looked at her eyes and I saw an angry glare. I looked at my heart and I saw that point in my life when I said: “henceforth, I will love myself!”

We should stop blaming our childhood for our misery and stop looking for someone to blame for our feelings of insecurity or unhappiness.

A perfect family doesn’t exist, same thing for any kind of relationships. So what can we do? If you can’t fix it, stop trying. You do not have the magic powder or elixir that will make everyone happy. No one does. Accept them as they are.

But, how can you accept them if you do not know how to accept who you are?

Try a long, hard stare in the bathroom mirror. Do you love what you see in the mirror? Does it show up in how you care for yourself and go about enjoying the gift of life and all the opportunities for Love it has to offer in your daily happening?

Come on, take that mirror and make a heart to heart talk with yourself.

I did that…from that day on, it was self love that has saved me from depression. It was self love that has finally pushed me to seek and stay in a healthy relationship. It was self love that stopped me from spiraling down a well which depth was unknown. It was self love that had picked me up from the ground that I thought I would never stand on again. It was self love that made me discover the immense love of God for me.

I am truly thankful that at a time when in spite of genuinely believing that I had lost everything, I was still able to produce within myself, a tiny dose of feeling people disdainfully address as self love, because it was this feeling that made me who I am today.

Love or narcissism?

If still, the mirror doesn’t work for you, try this magical mantra that you can repeat to yourself at all family/relationships dysfunctions. Memorize it and keep it close at heart: “I’m rubber, you’re glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you.”

I just received an email from Teresa, thanking me for this mantra…and has decided to make an appointment with herself!

Self-love quotes to follow…

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